This is Jonathan Letham - he with the neat bookshelves in yesterday's entry - quoted in Unpacking My Library:
I hate lending, or borrowing -- if you want me to read a book, tell me about it, or buy me a copy outright. Your loaned edition sits in my house like a real grievance. And in lieu of lending books, I buy extra copies of those I want to give away, which gives me the added pleasure of buying books I love again and again.
I surely understand the idea of a borrowed book sitting as a grievance. I have one I borrowed from a neighbor, The Devil in the White City by Erik Larson, that rests on my bedside table that, honestly, I do want to read, but have just not gotten around to beginning it. I really must give it back.
As for lending books, even though I now have a library lending kit of my own (see it here), I may have learned my lesson. Oddly enough, of all the books that people have borrowed - and never returned - there are two that I wish I still had. I lent Been Down So Long It Looks Like Up to Me by Richard Fariña to a college dorm mate. Never saw it again. I doubt if I would even want to read it now, but still its loss rankles. Talk about keeping a resentment!
The other book was an early edition of Clifton Fadiman's Lifetime Reading Plan. I have since replaced it with a later edition, but I would like to have my first purchase back on my shelves. Well, just because...
I have one book that I read as a library book, The Art of Travel by Alain de Botton. I loved it and bought a copy of to give to a relative. I don't know if she ever read it or not - she said she did but she was prone to saying the nice thing which is different from the true thing. She eventually gave it back to me. I am glad to have it.
Is there a book you have borrowed and never returned that 'sits like a real grievance'? Or are your grieving the loss of a book that you lent to a someone?
I've just been catching up on posts of yours that I've missed and now have even more books to try to read, shelves to fill anew, and a bit of yearning for books leant and never returned. It's funny, they are books I'll likely not read again, but, want that to be my choice. One, a book on gardening as one ages, I do wish I still had. I've given and bought again again Anne Morrow Lindbergh's Gifts from the Sea. I should just keep several in a box for giving. Belle, you have given me much to ponder in these posts. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteAh yes, Penny, 'Gift From the Sea' is one book that should be bought for friends instead of lent to them. The gardening book sounds intriguing. Maybe it will pop up one day in a used bookstore and you will be reunited!
DeleteJust yesterday I was thinking of a book I have on my shelves that was lent to me by a friend several years ago. I didn't want to read it particularly, but when I tried to give it back after keeping it for an embarrassingly long time, she asked me point-blank if I'd read it yet, and when I said no, she made me keep it. Now it just sits there looking reproachfully at me whenever I stumble upon it. I may just skim it, so that the next time I run into her, I can hand it back. I'd rather save shelf space for something I love.
ReplyDeleteHi Kathy. Oh my. Nothing like book intimidation! Maybe your friend meant for you to keep it as a gift. In that case, you are free to do what you want with it. I would hate to have that book sitting on my shelf like a gargoyle!
DeleteI loaned a Bradbury to a friend in high school and never saw it again. She didn't seem to think books were all that important. Years later I finally purchased another copy of it...but I'm still a little bitter about her carelessness. I also "lost" a book I loaned to a relative. After that incident I promised myself never to loan books out to people unless I knew with absolute conviction that I could trust them to return them. (Which means I only loan books to my sisters or my mother...because they always return them.)
ReplyDeleteLessons learned, eh, Lark? Isn't it funny how we can remember 'lost' books and who is responsible for their disappearance from our shelves!
DeleteI don't make a habit of borrowing or lending, so am not reminded of any "lost" book nor do I feel guilty for any on my shelves.
ReplyDeleteDevil in the White City takes awhile to read - learned quite a few tidbits of info about different things. This was given to me by a friend who gave me permission to pass on to my son who lived in the Chicago area for awhile and who is a landscape architect with special interest in urban planning. He recognized all the names or the architects/landscape architects in the book. I will agree it is a book that wouldn't interest everyone.
Joyce in KS
Joyce, now you have really piqued my interest in 'White City'. For the longest time I thought it was a book of fiction but now know better. I will keep it close by and who knows, maybe I will actually get around to starting it one day soon.
DeleteI have learned not to lend anything to one of my brothers, since he lent on one book to someone else, then broke up with them and the book was never seen again. And then, feeling rather sorry for him, I let him borrow a box set series that had been a present to me and... again...! No more books for him, EVER. They seem like minor quibbles - you know, it's only a book [except that boxed set!] and perhaps these other people have learned to love to read because of my books - but, still... Grrr.
ReplyDeleteBrothers! One can only hope that whoever has the book and the boxed set are enjoying them. Maybe they will find their way back to you one day. And no, losing a favorite book to a borrower is not a minor quibble! If it were, we wouldn't hang on to the painful memory.
DeleteI once lent a wonderful book by Mary Swander to a friend, and she wrote me a letter thanking me for the book and saying how much she enjoyed it. I didn't have the heart to tell her it was just a loan...
ReplyDeleteNow I must look at your borrowing kit.
That is a funny story, Kat. How nice, though, that you got a letter acknowledging your unwitting generosity...
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